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I want nothing more than to be that sexy, moody, artistic waif, lounging in a coffeeshop writing poetry, existing off of black coffee and cigarettes.


Saturday, May 15, 2010

Just like how i felt after the C & N pre-dance incident,
I don't feel like seeing the person i'm upset at.
except this time it's S.

but i do kind of want to see him,
which means i'm getting better.

he got into a fight with his dad last night,
that was why he was so worried i was mad at him.
i feel kind of bad, but i was mad.

he knew that was the reason i was mad too.
i could kick him.

movies with M later, we're going to the 10,
then possibly when prom is over for everyone going to a party.
at 4am.
i doubt it. =P

i look like taylor momsen haha.
except not skinny.
fat fat fat.
but i love the taylor momsen look.
i'm finally a platinum blonde =]
extensions should be here next week, yayy.

soo, i had half an everything bagel w. herb and garlic cream cheese
(i made sure to halve it with M so i wouldn't eat the whole thing.)
and a third of a blueberry fritter,
while we were playing chess at 4 am in Timmy's.

and then when i got up around 12, 1230,
i had some protein & fiber enriched Kashi cereal
it's actually amazing.
i think that was like 210 calories though.

well i was excited.
iduhno, i'm still excited.
because the scale said 124
with hairdye in my hair.
and after i had eaten the bagel hours earlier,
and then the cereal.
it still said 124. =]

yea i know, i wasn't gonna weigh till tomorrow.
but i will weigh myself tomorrow.
after i hopefully get in more walking,
and keep my eating down still.

wish me luck.
it's crazy to think that in just a couple days,
just by staying strong,
i could be in the 110s.
like mind you the higher end.
but out of the 120s.
holy crowwwww, excitinggg.

I don't know what to actually eat,
but at this time i'm not all too hungry.
so i guess i just won't eat.
it's better that way, yea.
the red lipstick i'm wearing does help deter me
from eating anything messy xD
and i just can't think of anything i wanna eat anyways.

haha oh gosh.
apparently a girl named Megan,
who somehow got my number from someone she doesn't remember
quite awhile ago apparently
went to school with me for a month,
but didn't have classes with me
was too shy to talk to me
doesn't have internet or facebook,
has only said hi to me twice
and has a huge crush on me

she's been texting me.
i dont remember who she is,
i don't know anyone named megan,
nor do pretty much any of my friends.
she's homeschooled.

jeepers. i just don't knoww.
i'm confused by her xD
but an interesting development in my day.