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I want nothing more than to be that sexy, moody, artistic waif, lounging in a coffeeshop writing poetry, existing off of black coffee and cigarettes.


Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Didn't feel hungry today.

ate a can of mushroom soup today anyways.
i ate the mushrooms,
it was too annoying to avoid them.
it's probably cheating on my fast,
but they were tiny,
so unless Adeline disagrees ?
i'll let it slide.

had crazy energy today.
tackled a unit in socio,
plan on getting some french done,
cleaned and organized my trailer
(took 2 hours ffs.)
and then the office took an hour.

mommy is here,
she came to visit because Dee pulled an LG stunt
and they had to have a family "intervention".
mom's going to the SOS tomorrow
so she can get Dee in programs and counselling.

i find it ironic that all the focus is always on her xD
but whatever.
i'm the eldest,
i'm supposed to be strong enough to work it all through on my own.

i prefer my life fucked up thanks =P
haha noooo.
i don't know.

i'm drained right now,
i don't know if you can tell by reading this,
but it's almost hard to type,
i'm sooo tired.

i had a dream i was in paris,
and i was sitting in a mall or something
and talking to this girl who was trying to get me to speak better french
and i was doing really well,
and i knew all that i was actually saying
just interesting.
i need to get my french finished.

i have a bio final exam,
that scared me a touch.
and i donno if i mentioned but when i found out i've got a midterm and final in french
i nearly burst into tears =P

we'll see,
i'm sure i'll do fine.

aughhh tiiiiired.

i have to ask still if S can spend the night friday.
i'd really like him too =P
hahaha obvvsss.

it's actually funny,
some days on my period i feel sexually starved !
but other days i'm like .. thank god i'm on my period.

i should be done tomorrow though,
 think i'm getting my "trick" day today.
do any of you get that ?
the day before the last day of your period
you have no flow whatsoever,
so you think it's done
and then you get it for one day and you're done =P

i missed my mommy.

i wonder if i can swing it so she can meet S before she goes ?

it's our one-month today =P
i'm not one to count weeks and months really.
but it's my personal record,
i've never dated someone longer than 2 weeks.

i'm tired.
i need a shower.
i need to drop another 15 pounds.

i find it strange that i've dropped almost 10 pounds,
and i look hardly any skinnier.
though i guess that's a good sign
meaning it's all coming off everywhere evenly ?

except i've calculated
that i only have 5 pounds to lose off my torso and arms
and then 10 off of my hips thighs and calves.
cuz that's where all my weight sits xD